कुछ मज़ेदार लम्हे…

November 16, 2009

बेचारा डॉक्टर

Filed under: हिंदी — Yogesh Marwaha @ 22:05
Tags: , ,

डॉक्टर: अब आपकी तबियत कैसी है?

मरीज़: डॉक्टर साहब, पहले से ज्यादा खराब हो गई है.

डॉक्टर: दवाई खा ली थी क्या?

मरीज़: नहीं डॉक्टर साहब, दवाई की शीशी तो भरी हुई थी.

डॉक्टर: अरे, मेरे कहने को मतलब है कि दवाई ले ली थी क्या.

मरीज़: जी, आपने दवाई दे दी थी और मैंने ले ली थी.

डॉक्टर: अबे, दवाई पी ली थी क्या?

मरीज़: ओहो, नहीं डॉक्टर साहब, दवाई तो लाल थी.

डॉक्टर: अबे गधे, दवाई को पी लिया था?

मरीज़: नहीं डॉक्टर, पीलिया तो मुझे था.

डॉक्टर: अबे, तेरी तो! दवाई तो मुहं लगाकर पेट में डाला था कि नहीं?

मरीज़: नहीं डॉक्टर साहब.

डॉक्टर: क्यों?

मरीज़: क्योंकि ढक्कन बंद था.

डॉक्टर: तेरी तो, साले! ढक्कन खोला क्यों नहीं?

मरीज़: साहब, आपने ही तो कहा था कि शीशी का ढक्कन बंद रखना.

डॉक्टर: तेरा ईलाज मैं नहीं कर सकता.

मरीज़: अच्छा डॉक्टर साहब, यह तो बता दो कि मैं ठीक कैसे होऊंगा.

डॉक्टर: अबे तेरी @$#$^!!!

Source: SMS

November 11, 2009

Q&A Session

Filed under: English — Yogesh Marwaha @ 14:22
Tags:

How do you stop a Pakistani tank?

Shoot the men who are pushing it.

How do you disable a Pakistani tank?

Hide the wind-up key.

How do you disable Pakistani missiles?

Cut the rubber band.

Pakistani Air Force officials have recently motioned for a name change for the PAF. They want to call it the PMC, the Pakistani Mining Corps. This is because their planes end up in the ground anyway.

Pakistani military researchers have recently ordered for the enlargement of the hatches on tanks and other armoured vehicles. This is so they can be more easily abandoned in enemy territory.

Have you ever seen Pakistani war heroes?

Neither has Pakistan.

Did you hear about the latest Pakistani invention?

It’s a solar powered flashlight.

Did you hear about the other latest Pakistani invention?

The new automatic parachutes. They open on impact.

How do you sink a Pakistani battleship?

Put it in water.

Did you hear about the 747 jet which crashed into a cemetery in Karachi?

The Pakistani officials have so far recovered 3000 bodies.

Did you hear about the Pakistani admiral who had asked to be buried at sea?

Five Pakistani sailors died digging his grave.

Did you hear about the other tragedy in Karachi?

There was a terrible power cut in Karachi’s Four Square Shopping Mall. People were stuck on the escalator for four hours.

Did you hear about the Pakistani family that froze to death outside a theatre?

They were waiting to see the movie “Closed for the winter”.

Did you hear about the Pakistani helicopter crash?

The pilot felt cold, so he turned off the fan.

Why do Pakistani dogs have flat noses?

They get it from chasing parked cars.

Did you hear about the Pakistani who studied diligently for five days?

He was scheduled to take a medical test.

Did you hear about the shutdown of the Karachi National Library?

Somebody stole the book.

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